Archives for posts with tag: Sentience

Though we all go our separate ways, we all still lean on one another for balance… All of us, finding strength and weakness in each other, at some point, are perfect compliments and our own contradictions, all born into this same union, this vast sentience that resembles a single body in turmoil, a tumultuous dream, and a frenzied dance within time and space where the push and pull of Life are always at odds, yet simultaneous, congruent, and a continuous ebb and flow, sometimes giving and other times receiving, until one at a time our cups are full and we recede into the light, the long enduring shadow still in view, shoved into the margins of our consciousness, but never quite forgotten, and never quite a memory, because all that is buried remains a seed.

Ballet Austin

Copyright 2005, Michael Torres ~ All Rights Reserved

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In striving, I am not always present in the moment, but instead stand divided, anchoring my position with stillness and a steadiness of heart, though I may feel like the remnant of accumulated yesterdays that is forever indebted to tomorrow. Yet, as the scattered milestones along my timeline begin to overlap (as if space-time were bending), I press onward toward my own equanimity where, among the ruins of deserted, half-conceived dreams and the wreckage of forced attempts, I am beginning to comprehend the meaning of a Limitless Self that is capable of transcending not only what is seen, but also, the boundaries of all that can be perceived by any faculty of the senses.

In striving, I seek. But I do not hunger for stature or possession, though the world may measure my accomplishments in such ways and accord those honors as wages paid. I will graciously accept such concessions as well, as recompense for having traversed the wilderness of this lifetime. But I long to behold something much greater than any convention can furnish; a Self that is seamless, in body, mind and spirit… within time, and without it. I want to belong to every moment, simultaneously, and to occupy a consciousness that requires neither Will, nor Reason to be; for I simply am… Sentient, and Ephemeral.

Life is a deliberate and personal encounter, a choice I make every day, to remain vulnerable to every nuance of feeling like an exposed nerve that amplifies the slightest touch. I want to always know what it means to Love and to experience heartache, to endure and to persevere. I have walked the edge of a knife for so long that the knife’s edge has become my bed, but not because I am unafraid, but because I hope to transcend even myself, to know with absolute certainty that the knife never existed, but instead has been my own incongruity.

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