It is said that, “Those who move against the grain rarely fair well.” (Author Unknown) And that’s probably true.

Despite the odds, however, as the predisposed maverick (that I am) who refuses to play the game of (my) Life by someone else’s rules, I feel quite optimistic about this new year, riding a slow but steady momentum, a machine in the making. I’ve somehow managed to keep the puzzle pieces in check while wandering astray, revitalizing.

I spent much of 2014 remembering; WHY I strive; WHY I sacrifice so much; and WHY any of it matters. But more important, I spent a large portion of 2014 remembering HOW… to live the Life I want to live (now, in the present).

I strive because I can, because my conscience compels me to be more than any set of circumstances. But I also strive out of obligation to myself, because I have freely chosen this life, the life of an artist, which is the purest expression of who and what I am (in this infinitesimal space in time). Although the cost of leading this life is much greater than what can be measured in money, the reward is also much greater than can be expressed. But that doesn’t make the journey any easier. In fact, it’s fair to say that I have struggled enough to satisfy an unflattering stereotype, that of starving (much to my chagrin). But that too has been by choice, when the choice has been presented, armed with the understanding that the Spirit is enough to sustain me when summoned to carry this relative mass I assume. And every bit of it matters… as an expression of my will; to feel and endure, and to be reborn; to thrive under the tremendous weight of Life, and to conquer (an inculcated mindset of doubt).

It has taken many years to find this place, this horizon that overlooks the valley of yesterday’s mistakes. And for the first time in my life, I finally understand the meaning of Self-Actualization, which I shall put to the test.

The fulfillment of one’s own potential is an “Act” of Faith, not a passive Believing (in something), nor the process of becoming. It is an active Being (this very moment) the precise “something” one intends, having only then the conviction to embody that “something” every day. Because, “In the end, we are what we pretend to be.” (from, Mother Night, Kurt Vonnegut)

Though “philosophers postulate that a human being is the universe in miniature form. It is more true that the essence of a person is the whole from which the cosmos grows.” (from, The Masnavi, Book IV, Rumi)

~ ’til next time

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